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Community > Birth Month
August 2024 Babies
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9
97sbaby
Idk if I should laugh or cry but my husband and I decided on naming our baby boy Jude and planned to keep it a secret until birth just because we’re not open to others opinions BUT he decided to tell his mom the name. I love my MIL and we have a wonderful relationship but for some reason she lost her mind when he told her we wanted to name him Jude and swore she wouldn’t call him that or even hold him if we did. She also believes it’s too feminine and that he needs a stronger male name. My husband is very upset and wants to change the name but I don’t have it in me I’ve gotten attached and even bought some custom items for him. Is it that bad of a name? I feel lost because I don’t want my husband to be in this situation but really I can’t wrap my head around another name now no matter how much I try (and I have tried) ��. Idk how to be more firm that this is the name I love and want and I also don’t want my MIL/husband to be upset that this all happened. What would you do?
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h
heyhavana01
I LOVE the name Jude - in fact it was mine and Hubbys second choice. We landed on Elliot and my grandma had a similar reaction, saying we needed something more manly and blah blah blah.
Honestly, naming a baby is hard enough with just 2 people deciding. I would absolutely put my foot down again husband and say “we already loved the name, why does her opinion matter that much?” And even throw in there that you’ve already spent money on customized items.
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secondtimemama24
@heyhavana01,
we’re going with Elliott as well!
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ftm7542901
This is such a bizarre reaction. Jude is a biblical name that is actually trending right now: very cute for a kid and also works well as he gets older. If you and your husband really like the name, then you shouldn’t let your MIL’s opinion sway you. Why is your husband so affected by his mother’s opinion on what he will be naming his son? I find it very manipulative to insist you won’t be using that name to refer to your grandson when that is his given name. She sounds very immature.
If you like that name and do not want to change it, I would make sure you voice that to your husband. After you both are on the same page, you should have a conversation with your MIL to set her straight. If she is going to act like this over a name, then I would be wary of how she may try to push the boundaries once your baby arrives. Grandkids change the dynamic for sure and sometimes great MILs can become nasty/controling.
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KB23momof2
@ftm7542901,
I agree 100% with this
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sweetpotato129
@ftm7542901,
this is my thoughts as well! Just better nip this in the butt right now because it's probably only the start with MIL trying to force her way over you both
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Blondie919
Oh I’m so sorry about this my friend!!
I love love Jude ! My husband shut it down pretty quick.
Here’s my thought- your MIL got to name her kids already it’s you and your husband’s time to shine.
I’d double down and call her bluff.
She’ll get over whatever she’s got going on . Stick with your gut
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kristintintinn
Jude was one of our top names! We’re ultimately not going with it but I love it. Sorry she’s having such a reaction and your partner is reacting to that, but personally I think it’s great :)
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j
jande63
I love Jude! It was our second choice and we will be using it if we have another boy one day. I’ve learned to ignore people’s reactions. She won’t (and shouldn’t) care once her grandson is in her arms ��
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SoonToBeABabyS
I wonder if she has a history with the name. Like maybe it reminds her of someone she doesn't like? If not, what an odd reaction. Jude is masculine to me.
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ktfdl
@SoonToBeABabyS,
yeah, the first name we picked out turned out to be my dad’s childhood friend that died in a tragic car accident. He had never mentioned it before but my mom took me aside and told me. So I didn’t want that association and we picked something else.
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ktfdl
Honestly I would hate to change the name on my MILS opinion but if my husband truly didn’t want to name the child that anymore, I couldn’t go through with it. I’d have to find something else.
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trillamarion
Jude is a plenty masculine name and she's being just plain ridiculous anyway. 🙄 I would tell your husband that his mother's opinion holds no weight. She got to name her kids and she gets no say in yours.
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luvbeinamama
@trillamarion,
this.
husband should be listening to his wife not mommy like he is 5 years old (also as a boy mom, it hurts to say this lol)
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babylizard3
I love Jude, it's on our list! Definitely not feminine.
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radbaby21
Your husband made the mistake. He should have had the maturity and foresight to know that his mom’s strong opinions will sway him, and that’s not fair to you since you two already agreed on a name. You shouldn’t have to pay the price for his mistake.
As far as MIL is concerned, just thank her for her opinion but ask her to respect that that this is a decision between you and your husband. If she puts up a fuss, tell her to put a sock in it.
By the way, I LOVE the name Jude. Hey Jude is one of my favorite Beatles songs!!
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